Bush League Science

House Fails to Override Stem Cell Veto

The posted link relates to the stem cell veto from two weeks ago. Its now pretty obvious that W's ethics only relate to the "killing" of 100-cell gummi clumps and not to the thousands of men, women and children that have died as a direct result of his reckless invasion of Iraq.

Since then (almost two weeks ago!) the House has passed a bill that tied a raise in the minimum wage to a repeal of the inheritance tax. The republican controlled government seemingly has no conscience. How can this party feel that the first raise in the minimum wage in 9 years should be "offset" by passing legislation that allows the wealthy to get even more wealthy without paying their fair share of taxes? How can these people look at themselves in the mirror in the morning?

I'm not saying the Dems are perfect or even blameless, but this present administrations history of grinding their heel into the poorest people in our society is unforgivable.

Work has been interesting, but I'm right on the edge of losing any edge I may have gained over the past week or so in regards to stepping up my performance. I guess that means I need to go in today so I can carve out some room to work on my projects next week. Oh well.

My involvement with my gaming group is approaching a turning point, I'm afraid. The overall maturity of the group has started to slip, and I'm becoming fairly uninterested in the general makeup of our group. I really don't need to hear from a bunch of teens and early 20 somethings brag about being bad asses. I'm conflicted to whether I should take this up with the other admins. I'm thinking its going to make me sound petty, so I'll probably just slowly back my way out of the conversations.

I hope Beth gets paid soon.

Peace.

One Week & A Year Older

So, not much happened luckily. I rated a 3 out of 5. I want to do better this coming year. I definitely received a clean slate. I'm in.

I celebrated my birthday today with friends, and not much family other than the canis familiars. Beth is still at work learning a new skill. So far she has not gotten home any earlier than 7:30. Tonight it will definitely be no earlier than 8:30. I'm not complaining much. I have a lot of varied feelings about her absence, but I'm not sure which one to pick. I will not lay these feelings on Beth and will strive to be mindful of her life and secure enough in myself to not feel like I'm being abandoned. Mindful of guidance down the path towards enlightenment.

It was fun at work. I got a bunch of happy birthdays, and even got to send the previous post's Tom Tomorrow to my conservative movie-reviewing co-worker. It was well received.

Here I go again all talk and no action. Its time to go ride, as I'm starting to want to be fit again and not look like Struthers the Hut. Its cooling off and still light enough after work to get a ride in. My pledge.

So 51st Happy Birthday Aldog.

Peace

Better Lucky than Good?

Wheh, it looks like I danced out of a potentialy giant-pain-in-the-ass situation that I engineered my way into. I hate making mistakes, especially over and over and over again.

No more? Who knows. To err is Allan.

One of my coworkers mentioned once that the only man that doesn't make mistakes is the person that does nothing. I'm all over that. Let me stay home, exercise and clean house. Low mistake potential sounds fine right about now.

My job eval has been scheduled for Monday. I guess that gives me the weekend to clean out my office. Seriously.

Let's see if I can find something funny to post here for a change.



Peace.

The Week Progresses

So here's the week that I was looking forward to. I'd like to say that my expectations were met (more on expectations later), but that would not be truthful. Honestly, I'm not sure what I was expecting, except for me to more efficient and productive. Maybe, but not completely. I am not being mindful of my work. Period. That needs to change.

Still haven't heard from my sister, so I guess no news is good news. Its not creating a bunch of anxiety, however I am curious as to where she ended up. The closest I ever came to being totally unattached to anything was when I first moved to Oregon. The week I spent driving around Washington alone, sleeping in fields, showering in school locker rooms and counting my pennies to make sure I could get back to Eugene was pretty exciting. At least in retrospect.

If I were to write up some memoirs, would it interest anyone but me? LOL...if you ask me, I'm pretty interesting.

Oh yeah. Allowing yourself to have unmet expectations is one of the pitfalls of life in the Buddhist tradition. This has been one of the most helpful teachings that I have gleaned from my brief study of Buddhism so far. The trouble is, where is the balance between avoiding unmet expectations and maintaining any sort of ambition?

Any answer will be appreciated.

Peace.

World Cup Sunday

Not sure why it matters, but it has been fun keeping up with the WC this year. It looks like France is going to play a man down since Zindane lost his mind. At least Dave Miller will be glad.

This has been a weird weekend. The ongoing saga with my sister Sheri continues. She has been flirting with homelessness since the beginning of this year. She's spent all of her cash on a couple of weeks in a motel, and the "friend" that she was counting on to let her stay with him for a short while was no where to be found. Surprise surprise. This is a woman that has no clue how to secure and maintain any sort of trustworthy relationship.

I know she's mentally ill, being diagnosed with a bipolar disorder. All she really wants to do is hang out and get high. Drug addiction to methamphetimine, but really almost anything she can inject will do. Proof of that was her getting busted shooting heroin/crank while she was staying at my 93-yo mother's house after getting out of a five year stay in the State Pen.

With Beth's help, I basically told Sheri that she was on her own. She had the option of calling a local shelter, which was apparently not an acceptable option for her. She left the conversation with comments about "spending the night at a bus stop" instead of lining up a place to stay for the night. Beth thought it was the normal Sheri tactic of trying to put someone else to blame for her situation. Sure, I could have spent some money on a motel room for her, but it would just be another situation of bailing her out and not allowing her to be accountable for her own actions. So, to cries of ".....I'm doing the best I can!" I told her it was totally her choice if she spent the night on the street last night.

She has, I think, totally sabotaged the effort to get her into a group home by getting caught with a positive drug test right at the "clean for six month" mark that would have allowed her to stay in the group home. She claims that someone was smoking crack in her room at the battered women's shelter while she was asleep. Sure. The bullshit meter is ringing off the hook. The background of this story had to do with her insistence that she couldn't live in a group home environment. Fine, your choice. Now you're out on the streets. Your choice.

She has qualified for a living subsidy from a local group that will put her up in an apartment for one-third of her total income. I hope that works out.

Onward. I am thankful Beth is in my life to lend me the strength to say no. It was tough.

Now, back to more pleasant things. I'm hoping to get the wife out to see the new Pirates movie this afternoon. I'm keeping my fingers crossed. I'm actually looking forward to work this week, so I'll post on that later.

This is more than enough babble for the blog.

Peace.

OK, its been almost a month. I guess I don't have much to say.

Beth started her residency this past Monday. I hope it works out. Who knows. Its going to be a lot of work, as she is going to be at work at least until midnight through the rest of this week.

I'm still wondering about my career. I am not at all being effective, and I'm wondering when that is going to catch up with me. I don't want to fail, or even do a shitty job, but I'm not having any luck being more than marginally motivated.

My sense of self, however, is doing pretty well. I'm feeling way more centered than I have for a long time. I need to keep up with the Buddhist thought for as long as I can, as it does seem to make some difference in the way I approach my life. Now I need to focus on regaining some of the intimacy that we have lost in the marriage. I'd like the physical part of our love for each other to play a role again in our life together.

Truthfully, I'm still not having any luck in exercising. Its way too easy to goof of, and bypass the heat, work and overall clumsiness of being a gimp athlete. Where did that part of my life go? My Buddhist self keeps telling me to not sweat it, but deep down I'm trying to make myself feel guilty enough to go exercise. An interesting conflict. I know how to work it out successfully, but I need the motivation to actually go out and do it.

Onward.

Peace.