So its been another month. Lots of work, nothing in particular successful, which in and of itself is unfortunate. I think I'm suffering from a crises of confidence. I'm tired of fighting for success in my engineering career, including motivating others to work really hard, bust their ass to make almost untenable deadlines, and to make money on shoe string budgets. What's next...maybe the public sector. Seriously.

Beth is going to start her psych residency in June, which is awesome. She needs some direction in order to keep that incredible intellect focused. That will keep her happy and interested. Besides, she's so good at being a doctor, that she is going to be a very good psychiatrist.

Politically, I can't believe that things can get any wierder than they already are. But, as always, I'm being proven wrong. GW is being proven to truly be the worst president I have ever lived through, including Nixon. If true, then the act of de-classifying Valerie Plame by GW just to discredit her husband's findings of made up reasons to go to war in Iraq is absolutely unimaginable! This act is the act of a petty man that lives up to my perception of a spoiled rich kid that has had everything handed to him regardless of whether or not he deserves it. So what if it is in his executive power to declassify something as he chooses. What about all of the various people that had business with Plame's CIA front company that have also now been outed by our vindictive chief executive? How can this stand? How can people still defend this asshole as a leader or as a "christian man"?

Joe Biden may or may not have made an announcement on Bill Maher last night regarding his candidacy for the presidency. His well reasoned stance on foreign policy, environmental issues, and even his disbelief that the American people chose to believe in creationism over evolution was great. I hope he has a chance. I hope for our country's sake that we can change the direction we have gone in the past eight years.

Peace out.

Its looking to be a nice mellow day. It actually snowed last night, the first time some white stuff fell and stuck in Alb all winter. I guess better late than never, but this moisture does very little to alleviate the current drought.

The last week was pretty tough. My roadway designs for the Rio Rancho Main Street project need some work. Not much, but I'm getting tired of having most of my work get redone once the budgets are gone. I wonder when I'm going to hear from NY?

I'm still kind of sick, as the UTI that I have been fighting for over a month now has been diagnosed as being antibiotic resistant. Well...duh. So now I get to try a desensitizing regime for my old nemesis, bactrin. The last time I took bactrin I broke out in a whole body welt, my lips swelled up, and I turned into a Darth Vader quality wheezer.

I managed to finally take the old crank set off my handcycle. It required a "cheater bar" about three feet long to break the thing loose. I put the new set on, but now I have to take it totally apart in order to make the derailer work. Oh well, if at first you don't succeed.

I haven't read much more of my Buddhist book this week. I did finish The Kite Runner, however. It was OK, but the first, second and third act format that this book was written in was a bit too obvious to my tastes. That and it seemed a little forced as to the trials and travails the protagonist had to endure.

So what's in store for the coming week? I need to try to catch up with a couple of basic admin tasks, and start the new job with GGI. I am also going to try to get some rides in if I get the crank set fixed today. That and maybe even help clean the house.

I'm worried about the direction this country is headed, and I don't know what is going to happen. I don't think the D's can win if Sen. Clinton is nominated, mostly because she, like J Kerry, is cursed with their vote of support for the Iraq debacle. I fear that the rest of the country has been fooled into thinking that the Bush admin's perfomance is all we can expect any more. If you keep your expectations low, then you won't be dissapointed.

Here's a TMW to mull over. Enjoy.

Peace.

So now its Monday AM, and I'm still at home, not a work. I'm feeling somewhat better, but I can't shake this UTI. Beth is threatening another tirade unless I go see a doc, so hopefully I can make that happen this morning.

It was a nice weekend, got some stuff done, but mostly hung out with Beth. I tried to take the crank set off the handcycle, but ran into some problems with the special nuts that Shimano uses to hold everything together. Hopefully I can borrow a wrench/adaptor and finish installing the new cranks. Yeah!!

I watched some of the Academy Awards last night. I thought Jon Stewart was hilarious. The bit he did on the "negative campaign" ads for best actress had me ROFL. The best line was easily "......she's no dame" in reference to Dame Judy Bent. In a lot of ways, it was fun watching someone like Stewart skewer the glitterati.

Onward. I'm enjoying reading Awakening the Buddha Within quite a bit. I'm trying to keep up with some brief meditation during each day, which is surprisingly calming. Go figure.

Peace.

So let's try out this blogging thing again.

Its been so long since I posted anything, its probably worth while trying to catch up.

Both Beth and my parents are now gone. Its been pretty traumatic, with Beth still almost unable to accept that her mom, Anita, in no longer with us. My folks passing has been equally emotional, but from a totally different perspective. Suffice it to say that my mom left me feeling somewhat betrayed. Nothing like getting the final last word in, huh Iva?

I'm working for Parsons Brinckerhoff again. Its great being back with some old friends and getting to work on some challenging projects. But.....the stress and my management of it has increased and decreased respectively. Maybe its more responsibility, but damn its almost untolerable.

There are so many reasons for this. Mostly, its beacause I don't exercise regularly any more. Why? Who knows. I think I can get back into it, but it's going to take some work and comittment on my part to try to get back to jock status again. It will be worth it, it always is, but somehow that whole part of my life seems very far away right now.

Oh well.

Peace.